Our Samcheok Dad

This is the story of a man. Particularly, this man:

Who is this man? This is Dad. Samcheok Dad. He was responsible for safely transporting a group of 10 foreigners from this place,

to this place,

to this place,

to a place with a lot of these,

over the course of three days in this:

Just like any other dad, Dad had some demons. And as the scenario in any television drama, these demons are not released and displayed until midway through the show. Things start off normally. He happily drives his bus aggressively around narrow curvy roads at 120km/hr just as well as he puts up with Paul's rendition of "Kiss the Girl." Aside from a few shouts, which we can loosely translate to "GOD HELP ME I WILL PULL THIS BUS OVER!" things are going great.

That is until the second night, when he comes knocking on our cabin door at 7:20pm shouting that we are late for our 7:30pm pick-up time. At first we are a bit surprised, but figure what the hell, we could eat now anyway. A few of us, however, are concerned about Dad's appearance. His normally booming 5 foot 6 presence is somewhat disconcerting tonight as he haphazardly sucks on a cigarette while leaning dangerously over the balcony railing. Apparently Dad was sitting in the bus outside for quite some time gleefully downing a few bottles of soju I later discovered he probably found under the stairs in the office of the cabin. Hoping that he acquired them in an honest fashion, I brush it aside. The cab drivers in Daegu talk on their cellphones while watching a TV on their dashboard while shouting things at me while smoking a cigarette and eating kimchi. Probably all while drunk too. But Dad isn't from Daegu, and I'm quite certain he doesn't drive a huge bus all too often.

After a very awkward walk to the bus, we notice that there is another man on the bus. Uncle. Dad was too drunk, so he had Uncle come over to take the duties from him. All is well. Except now we have an old, drunk, peppy, horny Korean man sitting on the bus with us shouting for Uncle to pump up the jams. Soon our bus is blasting drum-beats and synthesizer solos for the whole city to hear while Dad tears up the dance floor (aisle?) with the ladies. And the men. We figure that this can be tolerated for the 20 minute ride into the city, until that 20 minutes becomes 45 because Uncle has apparently never driven a bus before and hasn't driven faster than 25km/hr since we left. I don't even want to mention that Uncle was wearing a purple jumpsuit all night.

We go get some dinner and Dad joins us to down another couple bottles of soju. The dinner is all fine and dandy until Dad learns the word "dessert" and he's running laps around the table showing everyone the newest addition to his English vocabulary. Eventually he disappears into the night and we think we're done with him and in the safe, but rather sluggish, arms of Uncle for the rest of the night.

Upon leaving the restaurant, we get on to the bus and are waiting to leave when Uncle is evidently questioning where Dad is. We thought he left and it was cool, but I guess not. Someone then notices Dad standing in the dark alley with quite the ominous look on his face. We can only see that ominous look through the faint glow of the cigarette hanging from his mouth, so you can imagine the hush that fell upon our bus at that moment. Uncle gets out to retrieve him and Dad is having none of it. Punches are thrown, bodies are tossed aside, boxes are tumbling over, and a bolt of lightning strikes. After numerous Korean insults were shouted and hand gestures presented Uncle was driving and Dad was shaking his fist in rage.

We went to the most happening bar in Samcheok, had a grand time, and took the bus home that night completely ignoring the strange old lady that Uncle appeared to acquire in the time we were gone.

The next morning, Dad was up and ready to go at 11am, having appeared to forget anything that happened the night, or so implied his tiny smile and adorable hat.